The vision of the group I'm in now, comes closest to what I have wanted for my kids over the years. I'll paraphrase what the bylaws state the purpose of the group is to provide for the educational needs of its members by providing member organized educational enrichment and group activities, provide a communications network, promote homeschooling, and share resources. This comes the closest to any group I've been in to providing what my kids need - educational *fun* activities that provide both additional academic enrichment and an opportunity for my kids to see their friends on a regular basis. Providing these activities has led to other purely social activities such as our board game nights, play dates at our house, sleep overs, movie dates, etc.
However, I would argue that these social activities are educational. Socialization is one of the educational goals of homeschooling. Our group also has park day - which is a member organized purely social event. However, I would argue it is not purely social as the social aspect of our lives is part of our education. A purely social activity ends up being incredibly educational. Our group also does field trips which are 'educational' in nature. However, I've not been on a field trip in this group in which social lessons were not learned and practiced right along side the educational ones.
The fact is this - you can't have educational without the social and you can't have the social with out the educational. I would argue that not only are the two NOT mutually exclusive, but are DEPENDENT upon one another for the survival of a homeschooling group.
While some families will want a co-op sort of supplement to their home learning, others will require only field trips and park days - and there are many in betweens (for example, our group offers organized activities such as Girl Scouts, First Lego League, Spelling Bee, etc.). I don't know if there is a singular homeschooling group out there that can or would want to provide or be all things to all people. However, I think anyone can benefit both educationally and socially from a group focused on education.
Think about the old frustrating question we hear from people constantly when we tell them we are homeschooling: "But what about socialization?" Leave alone the fact that we all know what kind of crap this question is when referencing all we do as home schoolers. Most of us are so busy with our enrichment and social activities that we wonder how many times our children will crack a book open this week if we can't get our butts home and off the road.
So we join a homeschooling group to 'socialize' our poor friendless children because we are afraid that the people asking us, "But what about socialization?" could be right... I sometimes wonder, "Could I be harming my child socially by homeschooling?" Then I think about my school life. School was focused on education - academics - went to class many hours per day 5 days a week for many years. I managed to make a few friends and socialize along the way - but my school life was focused on academics. My social life focused on my extracurricular activities - for me that meant finding common ground with my friends in band, those who liked being outdoors and those who were interested in playing games (even if I didn't find my gaming soul until later in life).
I'm honestly beginning to realize that I've worried way too long and hard about the socialization of my children and have lost what the purpose of homeschooling is - education. The socialization occurs naturally if I provide my children with enough opportunity to interact with their peers on a daily basis or at least several times per week. Whatever the activity that enriches our current curriculum at home, (Drama, Art, Taekwondo, Park days, Field Trips, Science Classes, clubs etc.) somehow or another my kids seem to find the time to make friends and enjoy themselves. The aim of a homeschooling group does not have to be social because that is not the purpose of homeschooling. So what is the perfect homeschooling group? I don't think it exists. But for my kids, a group focused on educational enrichment will provide both the social and academic goals we are trying to reach.
What I have had to stop focusing on is how happy I am within the group. Since I rejoined this group that I am in now, I have made only a few new close friends even though the makeup of the group has changed quite a bit. When I rejoined, a lot of friendships and bonds were made that I couldn't seem to break into. I felt extremely unwanted and unneeded within the group. When there were things I thought I could bring to the group, I didn't because I didn't feel liked or wanted. So I have avoided getting involved. And I have avoided getting my children too involved because of my discomfort and hurt feelings. Until the past few months, I have avoided being involved because I just didn't feel liked within the current group structure. It left me feeling really depressed. Then I decided to begin work on our group's handbook (my job for the year) and while my social life within the group has not gotten a whole lot better - I still feel left out and alone a lot of the time - my attitude and knowledge about where the group is headed has improved. I've acknowledged this as an acceptable outcome because my kids are very happy within the group. So, while my group is not "the perfect homeschooling group" in my eyes - it is the best homeschooling group for my kids.
